Tuesday, March 21, 2006

BACTERIAL MOTIVATIONS AND MULTICELLULAR RELATIVITY

The erudite and enigmatic Gagdad Bob has a wonderful post up with this description of leftism/liberalism:
Rather, it is a topdown dogma that is not dictated by what works, but by how liberals would like reality to be. This is why liberalism must be enforced with the mechanism of political correctness, in order to preempt or punish those who deviate from liberal dogma, and see what they are not supposed to see.

It is a mistake to think of this as a problem afflicting only intellectuals. Rather, a moment's reflection reveals that it is a much more pervasive problem that afflicts artists, psychologists, literary types, etc. So what is common to all these folks? Why it's the tyranny of the abstract. All of these types fall in love with their own ideas, and take their ideas to be more real than reality. In fact, for such an individual, reality becomes a defective form of their sacred ought. Instead of "In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth," the overly abstract thinker says, "In the beginning, reality ought to be the way I want it to be."

Let's face it, if you are a ward of the state, a university professor with the luxury to idly pursue the intellectual life, have it pretty easy. You are living a rather sheltered existence, free from hunger, disease, pain, and want. Therefore, it's pretty easy to forget the violence that made such leisure and abundance possible, in the same way that it's easy to enjoy your health while forgetting that you're only healthy because you have a "primitive" but sophisticated immune system ready to do incredible violence to any foreign invaders who threaten your body's health. For these intellectuals and so-called spiritual types to have contempt for the military is as idiotic as having contempt for your body's immune system. But that doesn't stop elite universities from suing to get the ROTC and military recruiters off their campuses.

Try telling your immune system to be reasonable, to sit down and talk it out with the viruses that want to invade you. Tell your white blood cells to hold conferences to try to understand the root causes of bacterial motivations.

The ideals of abstract thinkers are utopian and unworkable because they forget all about embodied human existence--about reality. It is no coincidence that the great totalitarian movements of the past century--communism, nazism, and now Islamism--were and are the products of intellectuals. On the other hand, Christianity takes seriously the idea that we are unavoidably embodied and imperfectible. As a matter of fact, Judeo-Christian metaphysics solves the otherwise insoluble philosophical stalemate between idealists and materialists, because a logoistic reality means that the Word is made flesh: that the ideal is located in the real, not in some abstract, utopian beyond. The world is neither ethereal nor earthly: it is earthereal.

Abstract ideas are designed to understand and describe reality. But intellectuals turn this around and begin using their abstractions to judge reality. And if reality falls short, they don't abandon their ideals but jettison reality

Try telling your immune system to be reasonable, to sit down and talk it out with the viruses that want to invade you. Tell your white blood cells to hold conferences to try to understand the root causes of bacterial motivations. For me these two sentences were entirely delightful to read and led me to an incredible epiphany and a deeper understanding and appreciation of political correctness and multicultural, multicellular relativism.

I realized that both bacteria and viruses are members of an oppressed class (or phylum, if you prefer) ; and that they are therefore victims of the imperialistic and violent nature of homo sapiens (particularly conservative ones) !

I now realize that as homo sapiens ascended in the biological cosmos, the poor persecuted bacterial and viral kingdoms have had to endure a shameful and humiliating occupation of space that was once rightfully theirs and which comprised all the air, water, and earth of the entire planet. This sad situation is the result of multicellular fascism with its sadistic capitalistic desire to wipe out all competing biological kingdoms.

This is nothing less than cellucide or microcide or protozoacide or something--perhaps, genuside?

Homo sapiens' multicellular delusions of superiority are completely unjustified due to the uniquely destructive and bad behavior displayed by most of the members of animalia chordata mammalia primata homo sapiens -- particularly those who reside in the United States, the home of the least sapien.

What makes us think that our pathetic little animalia kingdom--and in particular the imperialistic chordata phylum-- is better than the EU-bacteria or archaebacteria kingdom? Do bacteria have wars? Do they kill each other? NO! They live quiet lives, of peaceful and communal, self-sacrificing propagation. Their eight phyla are as deserving of life as homo sapiens; in fact they are more deserving and their right to exist predates ours by many millennia, thus their rights supercede any "rights" presumed by the animal kingdom.

And compared to their simple, elegant, and non-material way of life; we greedy, sexist bipeds have a history of wreaking destruction and devastation, ruining every genus, species, phylum, and class with which we come in contact.

Have we even taken the time to try to understand why they behave toward us as they do? Have we tried to understand the despair of the suicide-bacteria, willing to embrace death even as they infect and kill us? Does their heroic martyrdom not demonstrate how desperate they have become under our occupation?

Our ruthless oppression must cease.

HOMO SAPIENS LIED AND STREPTOCOCCI DIED!

IMPEACH THE MAKERS OF PENICILLIN FOR CRIMES AGAINST MICROBIALITY!

ETC. ETC. !

Anyway, sorry for the digression. Go read Bob's piece.

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