Sigh...here's an inaugural address we'll never get to hear. By the hilarious P.J. O'Rourke.
MY FELLOW AMERICANS, I had intended to reach out to all of you and bring a divided nation together. But I changed my mind. America isn't divided by political ethos or ethnic origin. America isn't divided by region or religion. America is divided by jerks. Who wants to bring a bunch of jerks together with the rest of us? Let them stew in Berkeley, Boston, and Ann Arbor.
I can tell you they certainly are stewing in Ann Arbor ("20 square miles surrounded by reality"), where bright red and blue Kerry/Edwards signs continue to decorate many snow-covered lawns.
Read the rest and enjoy.